Blakk Frogg Joke Blog

OK, Blakk Frogg admits that he did not post a joke here, but damn it, man, this story taken from www.theregister.co.uk made him laugh real hard. A guy gets disqualified from a race down an inflatable doll race down a river because he “boinked” his raft along the way. Quality entertainment all the way around! Read for yourself:

“A participant in the annual Sex Dolls Rafting Tournament near St Petersburg was disqualified in shame for ‘”sexual abuse of apparatus’, Mosnews reports.”

“The event – held on the Vuoksa river and sponsored by ‘a number of Russian sex shops’ – this year attracted 400 athletes determined to tackle the choppy 1,200 metre course with nothing more than an inflatable partner for buoyancy, as our pic shows.”

“As organiser, Dmitriy Bulaviniv told Zizn’ newspaper: ‘It’s fun and difficult to swim in stormy river with an exotic apparatus, as inflatable ladies slip out of hands.'”

“Yes they do. According to Mosnews’s entertaining commentary, as ‘strong wind and flow snatched out resilient dolls from strong men’s hands’, only 40-year-old Igor Osipov was left to make the final climactic dash to the finish line. At this point, however, ‘the jury then noticed Osipov’s strange position and told him to moor. When he came out of the water, gazers saw signs of recent sexual activity on the swimmer’s doll.'”

“The mind boggles. The judges then ‘found the swimmer guilty of sexual abuse of the apparatus and disqualified him’ because, as the organisers explained: ‘Air sex dolls can be used only for swimming.'”

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Some folks may consider the idea of racing down a freezing cold rivcer with an inflatable sex doll in tow a poor representation of humanity….. but Blakk Frogg has decided to sponsor a team next year if he wins the lottery.

Many of you havee asked for the Most Popular Sarcastic MySpace Comments for October 2007, so here you will find them. Happy now?

most popular sarcastic myspace comments: october 2007

most popular sarcastic myspace comments: october 2007

most popular sarcastic myspace comments: october 2007

most popular sarcastic myspace comments: october 2007

most popular sarcastic myspace comments: october 2007

• Sarcastic MySpace Comments 1 thru 5
• Sarcastic MySpace Comments 6 thru 10
• Sarcastic MySpace Comments 11 thru 15

Previously: Popular Girls for MySpace

Three men… a doctor, a lawyer, and a biker, sat in a bar talking over a few drinks. After a sip of his martini, the doctor said, “You know, tomorrow is my anniversary. I bought my wife a diamond ring and a new Mercedes. I figure if she doesn’t like the diamond ring, then at least she will like the Mercedes, and she will know that I love her.”

After finishing his scotch, the lawyer said, “Well, on my last anniversary, I bought my wife a string of pearls and a trip to the Bahamas. I figured if she didn’t like the pearls, then at least she would have enjoyed the trip, and she would have known that I loved her.”

The Biker then took a big swig from his beer and said, “Yeah, well for my anniversary, I got my old lady a t-shirt and a vibrator. I figured if she didn’t like the t-shirt, then she could go fuck herself.”

Americas Best MySpace Motorcycles Comments

Some things defy logic, like WHY a man would try having sex with a hedgehog — but never-the-less a man did indeed try to do so….

Zoran Nikolovic, 35, from Belgrade, says the witchdoctor told him it would cure his premature ejaculation.

But he ended up in an operating theatre after the hedgehog’s needles left his penis severely lacerated.

A hospital spokesman said: “The animal was apparently unhurt and the patient came off much worse from the encounter. We have managed to repair the damage to his penis.”

Article originally posted on www.ananova.com

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Blakk Frogg asks, “Cure his premature ejaculation? What the HELL sort of medicinal properties could the vagina of a hedgehog possess that would cure premature ejaculation? Oh, well NOW he won’t have to worry about coming too quickly with woman. Why? Because what sort of woman wants to shack up with a guy who willfully fucks a hedgehog?!?”

Sorry there’s no pic to go with this sorry ass news story (not really sorry, though), so have fun with these Free MySpace Sex Comments.

Good driver? Bad driver? Safe driver? Danger to society?

A lot of people do NOT think while driving, and the following question will help you to find out if you fall into that ‘non-thinking driver’ category…

Situation: While driving down a narrow 2-lane road that the Department of Motor Vehicles has clearly marked as a no passing zone for the next 15 miles, you come up behind a pedestrian riding a bicycle…. and there is NO shoulder to ride on. Also, your lane does not have enough room for both the pedestrian on the bike and your vehicle. At this time you see no vehicles approaching in the opposite lane.

Question: Do you A) Approach slowly from the rear and pass on the left at the first possible moment? B) Approach slowly, sound horn softly so as to let the pedestrian know they need to pull over so that you can pass safely? C) Follow at a close, but safe distance with your flashers on until the road signs say you can pass legally?

Sarcastic MySpace Comments

Results: The correct answer is “C: Follow at a close, but safe distance with your flashers on until the road signs say you can pass legally.” No need to take any unnecessary risks on the road that would endanger other drivers, violate the law, or put pedestrians in harm’s way.

Interesting Corollary: The majority of men have no problem with that simple test and pass with flying colors. Women, on the other hand, haver a tendency to fail this test pretty much each and every time. No one has a clue why, though…..

Now what sick, twisted, demented motherfrogger came up with THIS inflatable beast? Nothing screams ‘FUN’ like a 4-foot tall pair of pink labial lips bouncing around in the hot sunlight.

Americas Best MySpace Random Comments

Seriously, though. What warped little cookie thought, “You know, nothing makes kids giggle with glee more than seeing a cute monkey with a blown-out vagina…..”

On another note, authorities think that giant monkey vagina swallowed Blakk Frogg’s car last week. Who wants to go in after it?

Americas Best MySpace Sarcastic Comments

Mother Superior called all the nuns together and said to them, “I must tell you all something. We have a case of gonorrhea in the convent.”

“Thank God,” said an elderly nun at the back. “I’m so tired of chardonnay.”

Americas Best MySpace Drinking Comments

To My Dear Wife,

“You will surely understand that I have certain needs that you, being 54 years old, can no longer satisfy. I am very happy with you and I value you as a good wife. Therefore, after reading this letter, I hope that you will not wrongly interpret the fact that I will be spending the evening with my 18 year old secretary at the Comfort Inn Hotel. Please don’t be upset – I shall be home before midnight.”

When the man came home late that night, he found the following letter on the dining room table:

To My Dear Husband,

“I received your letter and thank you for your honesty about my being 54 years old. I would like to take this opportunity to remind you tha t you are also 54 years old. As you know, I am a math teacher at our local college. I would like to inform you that while you read this, I will be at the Hotel Fiesta with Michael, one of my students, who is also the assistant tennis coach. He is young, virile, and like your secretary, is 18 years old. As a successful businessman who has an excellent knowledge of Math, you will understand that we are in the same situation, although with one small difference – 18 goes into 54 a lot more times than 54 goes into 18. Therefore, I will not be home until sometime tomorrow”.

Americas Best MySpace Sarcastic Comments

Every once in a while at the office you will hear something out of context that will make you stop, turn around, and say, “Wait. What the HELL did you just say?”

This morning Blakk Frogg overheard something that made him say those very words.

A female co-worker said, and Blakk Frogg quotes directly, “Not gonna’ eat it, just shove it in there. Then tie up the legs….”

Some of you fine, upstanding citizens will know she referred to preparing a turkey, but the rest of you perverts and deviants thought the same thing as Blakk Frogg…. and that’s alright.

Simply Frogg and Americas Best
free jokes, comments and graphics

Looking for more sarcasm, humor and wit from the fingertips of Blakk Frogg? Da’ Americas Best Sarcasm/Humor Site can help you make better brownies…. or at least keep you from slitting your wrist before dinner.