Blakk Frogg Joke Blog

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“In My Bed, Thinking of You…”

As I lay on my bed, thinking about you, I feel this

strong urge to grab you and squeeze you, because I

can’t forget last night. You came to me unexpectedly

during the balmy and calm night, and what happened in

my bed still leaves a tingling sensation in me.


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You appeared from nowhere and shamelessly, without any

reservations, you laid on my naked body…you sensed

my indifference, so you started to bite my body

without any guilt or humiliation, and you drove me

crazy while you sucked me dry.


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Finally I went to sleep. Today when I woke up, you

were gone, I searched for you but to no avail, only

the sheets bore witness to last night’s events.

My body still shows your marks, making it harder to

forget you. Tonight I will remain awake waiting for

you… as soon you appear I will quickly grab you and

won’t let you go, will hold you with all my strength

so you won’t disappear. Won’t rest until l squeeze

your blood out….. you fucking little mosquito.

Jake was dying. His wife sat at the bedside.

He looked up and said weakly: “I have something I must confess.”

“There’s no need to,” his wife replied.

“No,” he insisted, “I want to die in peace. I slept with your sister, your best friend, her best friend, and your mother!”

“I know,” she replied. “Now just rest and let the poison work.”


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Bill Clinton started jogging near his new home in Chappaqua.

But on each run he happened to jog past a hooker standing on the same street corner, day after day.

With some apprehension he would brace himself as he approached her for what was most certainly to follow.

‘Fifty dollars!’ she would cry out from the curb.

‘No, Five dollars!’ fired back Clinton ….

This ritual between Bill and the hooker continued for days.

He’d run by and she’d yell, ‘Fifty dollars!’

And he’d yell back, ‘Five dollars!’

One day however, Hillary decided that she wanted to accompany her husband on his jog!

As the jogging couple neared the problematic street corner, Bill realized the ‘pro’ would bark her $50 offer and Hillary would wonder what he’d really been doing on all his past outings.

He realized he should have a darn good explanation for the junior Senator.

As they jogged into the turn that would take them past the corner,

Bill became even more apprehensive than usual.

Sure enough, there was the hooker!

Bill tried to avoid the prostitute’s eyes as she watched the pair jog past.

Then, from the sidewalk, the hooker yelled… See what you get for five bucks!?’


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06 Feb, 2008

Bill Clinton Goes for a Swim

Posted by: admin In: Funny Jokes|Humor|Jokes|Sarcastic

Blakk Frogg says, “Some politicians really are all wet.”

= = = = = = = = =

Back during a portion of the Clinton Administration White House security agents noticed Bill Clinton using the pool more often than usual.

Every day at exactly 4:25 PM the President changed into his swimwear and jumped into the pool.

He then proceeded to take a deep breath, dive to the bottom, and stay there until he ran out of breath. He then rushed to the surface, quickly grabbed another breath and repeated the process over and over again until he was on the brink of exhaustion.

Then and only then would he crawl out of the pool, dry off, put his work clothes back on go about completing his normal Presidential duties.

After a week of this behavior, fearing for Bill’s mental stability, one of the security agents gathered the courage to ask him why he was acting so strangely.

“Well,” said Clinton, “One of my advisors told me that deep down I’m not so stupid.”


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1. You hand a bank teller an envelope, and when she asks, “What’s this?” you realize you just dropped the company’s deposit in a mailbox.


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2. A woman comes into the store, you turn to the other salesman and say, “I waited on the last fat ugly old lady. This one’s your turn.” Your boss was standing behind you. It’s his wife.


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3. You return from a week’s vacation to find that you had scheduled this week as vacation, not last week.

4. You take a “sick” day and the next morning the boss asks you, “So, how was the fishing on Rock Creek yesterday?”


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5. You wake up hung over. You have a black eye and bloody knuckles. Your underwear are missing. You’re in jail. Last night was the company Christmas party.

Ever wonder what happened when Charlie Brown hit puberty? Blakk Frogg certainly did!

Would that ‘blockhead’ actually develop a set of nuts and shove his cartoon meat stick in a classmate or would he spend the bulk of his adolescence frequenting pay-per-view porn theaters dodging gooey stains on the floor?

After some reseach, we finally have the answer:


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Americas Best MySpace Sex Comments

OK, folks, there you have it. Charlie Brown had a rough start to puberty but once he got the hang of his newly found appendage, he became a true pimp.

Blakk Frogg finds some people waaaaay too vain for their own good. Read this joke and find out what happens when vanity turns around and bites this guy in the ass!

An extraordinarily handsome man decided he had the responsibility to marry the perfect woman so they could produce beautiful children beyond compare. With that as his mission, he began to search for the perfect woman.

Shortly there after he met a Redneck who had three stunning, gorgeous daughters that positively took his breath away. With lust in his eyes and love (for himself!) in his heart, he explained his mission to the Redneck and asked for permission to marry one of them.

The Redneck simply replied, “They’re lookin’ to get married, so you came to the right place. Look ’em over and pick the one you want.”

The man dated the first daughter.

The next day the Redneck asked for the man’s opinion.

“Well,” said the man, “she’s just a weeeeee bit, not that you can hardly notice… pigeon-toed.”

The Redneck nodded and suggested the man date one of the other girls; so the man went out with the second daughter.

The next day, the Redneck again asked how things went.

“Well,” the man replied, “she’s just a weeeee bit, not that you can hardly tell.. cross-eyed.”

The Redneck nodded and suggested he date the third girl to see if things might be better. So he did.

The next morning the man rushed in exclaiming, “She’s perfect, just perfect. She’s the one I want to marry.”

So they were wed right away. Months later the baby was born. When the man visited the nursery he was horrified: the baby was the ugliest, most pathetic human you can imagine. He rushed to his father-in-law and asked how such a thing could happen considering the beauty of the parents.

“Well,” explained the Redneck, “She was just a weeeee bit, not that you could hardly tell… pregnant when you met her.”


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About This Site


First of all, you will like this site because it has lots of sarcasm, plenty of humor, and a healthy dose of everything your dear mommy warned you not touch when taking a shower at the local athletic club.


  • admin: How can people not like this photo? Seriously. These girls have WONDERFUL personalities that just leap out of their shirts, er, eyes. Yes. Blakk Fr
  • admin: In other news, the children ingested so much of the drug that it took their parents a solid two weeks to catch the little bastards and beat their behi
  • Intimate Touch Tuesday | MySpace Comments & Jokes: [...] you survived the horror called Monday and showed back up to face… Tuesday. Good for you! As a reward for your devotion and effort, [...]