Blakk Frogg Joke Blog

‘Tis the season for Holiday parties, long nights of sipping spiked eggnog with friends, and ugly sweater wine parties… so before you think about getting behind the wheel after a social event involving alcohol this Holiday Season, please remember this short story before making up your mind:

With the Holidays upon us I would like to share a personal experience with my friends about drinking and driving.

As you may know some of us have been known to have brushes with the authorities from time to time on the way home after a “social session” out with friends. Well, two days ago I was out for an evening with friends and had several cocktails followed by some rather nice red wine. Feeling jolly I still had the sense to know that I may be slightly over the limit.

That’s when I did something that I’ve never done before – I took a cab home.

Sure enough on the way home there was a police road block, but since it was a cab they waved it past. I arrived home safely without incident.

This was a real surprise… as I had never driven a cab before, I don’t know where I got it and now that it’s in my garage I don’t know what to do with it.

In all seriousness, though…

No matter what time of year it is, please think about the risks associated with driving under the influence before getting behind the wheel. We speak from experience when we say the problems associated with even the slightest ‘issue’ that can arise from drinking and driving last far longer than you want… The serious ones, like loss of life — be it yours, a loved one’s, or a stranger’s — speak for themselves.

If ya’ cannot control your thirst, then you certainly have no business trying to control a car!

From the State where drunk driving is considered a sport, comes an alleged true story from Central Montana.

Recently a routine police patrol parked outside a local Neighborhood tavern. Late in the evening the officer noticed a man leaving the bar so intoxicated that he could barely walk. The man stumbled around the parking lot for a few minutes, with the officer quietly observing. After what seemed an eternity and trying his keys on five vehicles, the man managed to find his car which he fell into.

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He was there for a few minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar and drove off. Finally he started the car, switched the wipers on and off (it was a fine dry night) flicked the blinkers on, then off, honked the horn and then switched on the lights. He moved the vehicle forward a few inches, reversed a little and then remained still for a few more minutes as some more vehicles left.

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At last he pulled out of the parking lot and started to drive slowly down the road. The police officer, having patiently waited all this time, now started up the patrol car, put on the flashing lights, promptly pulled the man over and carried out a breathalyzer test. To his amazement the breathalyzer indicated no evidence of the man having consumed alcohol at all!

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Dumbfounded, the officer said, “I’ll have to ask you to accompany me to the Police station. Apparently this breathalyzer equipment must be broken.”

“I doubt it,” said the man, “Tonight I’m the designated decoy.”

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