Blakk Frogg Joke Blog

Never really though about this one before, but costumes available for men and women do come in very different sorts. For males the costumes overflow with courage, confidence and bravery. Women’s costumes overflow with… cleavage.

Not complaining, just saying…

For those searching for a way to politely decline unwanted Valentine attention, do NOT do something like this:

Do not shoot Cupid or ANYone this Valentine’s Day…
Seriously. Not. Worth. It. Seriously.

“Rejection spells the end of a fantasy, not life” — Blakk Frogg

Just… Wow. As funny as the message in this fake Valentine appears, several companies actually sell kits like this.

Love Does Not Have To Hurt… Ya’ Know?

Looking for a way to ‘ease the pain’ in someone’s life? Undercover Condoms has a few things that may do the trick.

And, as Blakk Frogg always says, safety during the ‘numbers game’ called finding love requires one to think about the possibility of catching an itch that won’t ever go away!

Blakk Frogg says, “Sorry, men and women, but all the sweets from your sweet COULD turn you into a not so delicious treat in a week or so…”

Ahem. Please use caution when consuming all those calorie bombs women AND men.

Ration the Chocolates, Everyone! Make ‘Em Last, Men & Women!

Listen here, men: Blakk Frogg KNOWS some of you need a lesson when it comes to how to, and NOT to, behave when dealing with women. So here’s REAL WORLD ADVICE that you ought to listen to…

Bad, Bad Valentine’s Day Behavior!!!

Blakk Frogg says, “Roughly nine months after Valentine’s Day a very special event can happen — and some folks didn’t intend for it to happen — so PLEASE, people, use protection w/ your sweetheart if you don’t mean to make a baby this evening!”

Dads, if you have a daughter then that you love, care about, would do anything for, and would like not to see knocked up, pregnant, with child, etc. before the age of, um, well not until after they finish college, get a job, etc., then THIS shirt is for YOU!

Dads Against Daughters Dating
 

Just… WOW. When Blakk Frogg read this Dear Abby article he nearly choked on his breakfast. Ha ha. 18-yr old daughter lost her job and now wants to become a prostitute.

Sound like something too hard to believe? Read the full article here on Yahoo! and see for yourself, ua’ filthy bunch of non-believers!

Blakk Frogg’s Humble Opinion

Hilarious. An eighteen year old honestly believes that selling her body to any Tom, DICK or Harry will allow her to make more money and live a better life. What the Hell kind of upbringing did this girl have that she would really think a life of debauchery for hire on the seedy (another good pun!) side of life makes any kind of sense?

Congratulations, Mom (and others), on waiting until the last minute to let your daughter know that a fast-paced career on her knees won’t pay off in the end.

There will be no happy ending; except for the customer.

Da’ Blakk Frogg Joke Blog

Please note that although Blakk Frogg opted to use the above funny stripper joke image in this posting, he does NOT equate adult entertainment w/ prostitution. He definitely sees a difference between a young woman ‘dancing for dollars’ around poles and a young woman spreading her holes for strangers’ poles!

A guy walked into the local welfare office to pick up his check.

He marched straight up to the counter and said, “Hi. You know, I just HATE drawing welfare. I’d really rather have a job.”

The social worker behind the counter said, “Your timing is excellent. We just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a Chauffeur and bodyguard for his beautiful daughter. You’ll have to drive around in his 2010 Mercedes-Benz CL550 and he will supply all of your clothes. Because of the long hours, meals will be provided. You’ll also be expected to escort the daughter on her overseas holiday trips. This is rather awkward to say, but you will also have to, as part of your job assignment, satisfy her sexual urges as the daughter is in her mid-20’s and has a rather strong sex drive.”

The guy, just plain wide-eyed said, “You’re bullsh#ttin’ me!”

The social worker said, “Yeah, well … You started it.”

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For those of you with a drug problem and children at home, don’t let this happen to you! Hide your drugs in more appropriate places!

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