Blakk Frogg Joke Blog

Thanks for tuning in to see the top fifteen MySpace Comments on Americas-Best.Com for the month of January 2007! You picked ’em so don’t blame us, damn it!

Americas Best MySpace Comments

Americas Best MySpace Comments

Americas Best MySpace Comments

Americas Best MySpace Comments

Americas Best MySpace Comments

Popular MySpace Comments 6 – 10

Blakk Frogg says, “Mortician who take work home is a sick, sick man. Wife should leave him and come to my place.”

A mortician was working late one night. He examined the body of Mr. Schwartz, about to be cremated, and made a startling discovery. Schwartz had the largest private part he had ever seen!

“I’m sorry Mr. Schwartz,” the mortician commented, “I can’t allow you to be cremated with such an impressive private part. It must be saved for posterity.”

So, he removed it, stuffed it into his briefcase, and took it home.

“I have something to show you won’t believe,” he said to his wife, opening his briefcase.

“My God!” the wife exclaimed, “Schwartz is dead!”

Americas Best MySpace Sex Comments

Blakk Frogg says, “Modern art way too confusing. Thank goodness for old fashioned porn!”

A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door.

“Hurry,” she said, “stand in the corner.” She rubbed baby oil all over him, then dusted him with talcum powder. “Don’t move until I tell you,” she said. “Pretend you’re a statue.”

“What’s this?” the husband inquired as he entered the room.

“Oh it’s a statue,” she replied, “the Smiths bought one and I liked it so I got one for us, too.”

No more was said, not even when they went to bed.

Around 2 AM the husband got up, went to the kitchen and returned with a sandwich and a beer. “Here,” he said to the statue, have this. I stood like that for two days at the Smiths and nobody offered me a damned thing.”

Americas Best MySpace Sex Comments

Blakk Frogg says, “One good turn deserves another, so turn around, go to the bar, and get me a beer!”

A man walked into a cafe, went to the bar and ordered a beer.

“Certainly, Sir , that’ll be one cent,” said the barman.

“One Cent?” the man exclaimed. He glanced at the menu and asked: “How much for a nice juicy steak and a bottle of wine?”

“A nickel,” the barman replied.

“A nickel?!?” exclaimed the man. “Where’s the guy who owns this place?”

The bartender replied: “Upstairs, with my wife.”

The man asked: “What’s he doing upstairs with your wife?”

The bartender replied: “The same thing I’m doing to his business down here.”

Americas Best MySpace Sex Comments

Jake was dying. His wife sat at the bedside.

He looked up and said weakly: “I have something I must confess.”

“There’s no need to,” his wife replied.

“No,” he insisted, “I want to die in peace. I slept with your sister, your best friend, her best friend, and your mother!”

“I know,” she replied. “Now just rest and let the poison work.”

Americas Best MySpace Sarcastic Comments

A month has passed since we last treated you to a list of the most popular entries on Da’ Blakk Frogg Joke Blog… so here ya’ go, ya’ filthy little bastards. Enjoy!

1. Popular Sexual & Adult MySpace Comments
2. Obsessed w/ Camel Toe?
3. Sexual & Adult MySpace Comments?
4. Sweet Devon Black Panties & Bra Pics
5. Oral Sex, People! Oral Sex!
6. Popular Adult MySpace Comments
7. Ultimate Redneck MySpace Comment
8. I Believe in Sexy Saturdays
9. Potato Prostitute
10. Popular Sarcastic MySpace Comments (Dec 2007)

– Da’ Blakk Frogg Joke Blog Main Page –

A couple of women were playing golf one sunny Saturday morning. The first of the twosome teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole.

The ball hit one of the men, and he immediately clasped his hands together at his groin, fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in evident agony.

The woman rushed down to the man and immediately began to apologize. “Please allow me to help. I’m a physical therapist and I know I could relieve your pain if you’d allow me,” she told him earnestly.

Americas Best MySpace Sports Comments

“Ummph, oooh, nnooo, I’ll be alright. I’ll be fine in a few minutes,” he replied breathlessly as he remained in the fetal position still clasping his hands together in his groin.

But she persisted, and he finally allowed her to help him. She gently took his hands away and laid them to the side, she loosened his pants, and she put her hands inside. She began to massage him.

She then asked him “How does that feel?” He replied “It feels great, but my thumb still hurts like hell.”

Americas Best MySpace Sports Comments

Bill Clinton started jogging near his new home in Chappaqua.

But on each run he happened to jog past a hooker standing on the same street corner, day after day.

With some apprehension he would brace himself as he approached her for what was most certainly to follow.

‘Fifty dollars!’ she would cry out from the curb.

‘No, Five dollars!’ fired back Clinton ….

This ritual between Bill and the hooker continued for days.

He’d run by and she’d yell, ‘Fifty dollars!’

And he’d yell back, ‘Five dollars!’

One day however, Hillary decided that she wanted to accompany her husband on his jog!

As the jogging couple neared the problematic street corner, Bill realized the ‘pro’ would bark her $50 offer and Hillary would wonder what he’d really been doing on all his past outings.

He realized he should have a darn good explanation for the junior Senator.

As they jogged into the turn that would take them past the corner,

Bill became even more apprehensive than usual.

Sure enough, there was the hooker!

Bill tried to avoid the prostitute’s eyes as she watched the pair jog past.

Then, from the sidewalk, the hooker yelled… See what you get for five bucks!?’

Americas Best MySpace Political Comments

A lady goes to her priest one day and tells him, ‘Father, I have a problem. I have two female parrots, but they only know how to say one thing.’

‘What do they say?’ the priest inquired.

They say, ‘Hi, we’re hookers! Do you want to have some fun?’

‘That’s obscene!’ the priest exclaimed. Then he thought for a moment.

‘You know,’ he said, ‘I may have a solution to your problem. I have two male talking parrots, which I have taught to pray and read the Bible. Bring your two parrots over to my house, and we’ll put them in the cage with Francis and Peter. My parrots can teach your parrots to praise and worship, and your parrots are sure to stop saying that phrase in no time.’

‘Thank you,’ the woman responded, ‘this may very well be the solution.’

The next day, she brought her female parrots to the priest’s house. As he ushered her in, she saw that his two male parrots were inside their cage holding rosary beads and praying. Impressed, she walked over and placed her parrots in the cage with them. After a few minutes, the female parrots cried out in unison:

‘Hi, we’re hookers! Do you want to have some fun?’

There was stunned silence. Shocked, one male parrot looked over at the other male parrot and exclaimed, ‘Put the beads away, Frank. Our prayers have been answered!’

Americas Best MySpace Girls Comments

As if fat people don’t have enough trouble fitting into plane seats, finding clothes that fit, keeping food in their cupboards, affording outrageous grocery bills, and maintaining self-esteem despite continuous ridicule from people in their surroundings….. Now there exists a more sinister problem for them:

Sarcastic MySpace Comments

So if ya’ wanna’ do that Advanced Sex Position on page 33 of your manual, you’re gonna’ want to lose a few pounds first!

– blakk frogg