Blakk Frogg Joke Blog

Recently a man had to go to the hospital to have his wedding ring cut off from his penis after his mistress found the ring in his pants pocket and got so mad at him that she stuck it ‘on him’ while he was asleep.

I don’t know what’s worse:

1) having your mistress find out you’re married.2) explaining to your wife how your wedding ring got on your penis.

3) Or finding out your penis fits through your wedding ring.

Words from Blakk Frogg:

Now what kind of host would leave you without some sort of pictures to highlight that small penis story?

Sarcastic MySpace Comments Dot Com

Just about everyone likes to have sex, and who can blame them. Did you know that scientists recently broke sex down into seven different types?

• Click Here for Smurf Sex
• Click Here for Kitchen Sex
• Click Here for Bedroom Sex
• Click Here for Hallway Sex
• Click Here for Courtroom Sex
• Click Here for Religious Sex
• Click Here for Social Security Sex

Americas Best MySpace Sex Comments

Anyone who has had a loved one in the hospital — or has been in the hospital — will appreciate this.

A woman called a local hospital. “Hello. Could you connect me to the person who gives information about patients? I’d like to find out if a patient is getting better, doing as expected or getting worse.”

The voice on the other end asked, “What is the patient’s name and room number?”

“Sarah Finkel, Room 302.”

“I’ll connect you to the nursing station.”

“Third floor nursing station. How can I help you?”

“I’d like to know the condition of Sarah Finkel in Room 302.”

“Just a moment, let me look at her records. Mrs. Finkel is very well. In fact she had two full meals, her blood pressure is fine, she is to be taken off the heart monitor in a couple of hours, and if she continues this improvement, Dr. Cohen is going to send her home on Tuesday.”

The woman said, ” What a relief! Oh, that’s fantastic. That’s wonderful news.”

The nurse said, “From your enthusiasm, I take it, you are a close family member, or are you a very close friend?”

“Neither. I’m Sarah Finkel in Room 302. Nobody tells me shit.”

Sarcastic MySpace Comments

A man and woman had been married for more than 60 years.

They had shared everything. They had talked about everything. They had kept no secrets from each other except that the little old woman had a shoe-box in the top of her closet that she had cautioned her husband never to open or ask her about.

For all of these years, he had never thought about the box, but one day the little old woman got very sick and the doctor said she would not recover. In trying to sort out their affairs, the little old man took down the shoe-box and took it to his wife’s bedside.

She agreed that it was time that he should know what was in the box.

When he opened it, he found two crocheted dolls and a stack of money totaling $95,000. He asked her about the contents.

“When we were to be married,” she said, “my grandmother told me the secret of a happy marriage was to never argue. She told me that if I ever got angry with you, I should just keep quiet and crochet a doll.”

The little old man was so moved; he had to fight back tears. Only two precious dolls were in the box. She had only been a angry with him two times in all those years of living and loving. He almost burst with happiness. “Honey,” he said, “that explains the doll, but what about all of this money? Where did it come from? “

“Oh,” she said, “That’s the money I made from selling the dolls.”

Americas Best MySpace Sex Comments

The clothes you wear, your home furnishings and the car you drive all give clues to your sexual personality. The key is the colors you select for your possessions.

Ready to choose the color which one best suits you?

main | red | yellow | pink | purple | black
green | orange | brown | gray | blue | white

Not ready yet? OK, Well most people claim they haven’t a favorite color, but look around you and you’ll notice a pattern — especially in your clothing and home decor.

The predominant color for you is the one that appears most frequently – it’s the one that mirrors the sexual you.

NOW choose the color which one best suits you:

main | red | yellow | pink | purple | black
green | orange | brown | gray | blue | white

Americas Best MySpace Sex Comments

Mr. Burford is checking out of a hotel when suddenly he has to take a shit real bad. The toilet in his room isn’t working, so he bolts down to use the lobby Men’s Room, but all of the stalls are occupied, so he runs back up to his room, and in desperation, he drops his pants, uproots a plant, and takes a shit in the pot. Then he puts the plant back in the pot and leaves.

Two weeks later, he gets a postcard from the hotel that says, “Dear Mr. Burford… All is forgiven. Just tell us… where it is?”

Americas Best MySpace Toilet Comments

One winter year, these two little fleas headed for the warm sunny beaches of California to escape the cold. The first flea got there and started rubbing suntan lotion on his little flea arms and his little flee legs. Just then, the second flea arrived just a shiverin’ and a shakin’.

The first flea asked, “What the hell happened to you?”

To which the second flea replied “I just rode out here on a bikers mustache and I’m so very coldddd!”

The first flea said, “Don’t you know the special trick to gettin here, first you go to the airport, go straight to the ladies bathroom, wait for a pretty young stewardess to come along, and when she sits down you climb right up in there where its nice and warm”.

The second flea agreed that this was a grand idea. The next winter comes along and it was time for the fleas to head for the sunny beaches again. The first flea arrived and began putting suntan lotion on his little flea arms and his little flea legs. About that time, the second flea arrived again just a shiverin’, shakin’, and mumbling about how cold he was.

The first flea exclaimed “Didn’t you learn anything that I taught you about getting here nice and warm?”

To which the second flea replied, “I did just as you said; I went to the ladies bathroom and this pretty stewardess came in and sat down. I climbed right up in there and it was so very warm. Next thing I know we stop at a bar and I fell asleep. All of a sudden I woke and there I was, right back on that bikers mustache!”

Time again to recap the most popular jokes on Da’ Blakk Frogg Joke Blog for the past 30 days! Seems that a lot of you like sex, pretty girls and that sort of thing this month. . . Ya’ bunch of horny bastards! 😛

• Potato Prostitute
• Popular Sexual & Adult Myspace Comments
• Popular Adult MySpace Comments
• Sexual Adult MySpace Comments?
• Best Redneck MySpace Comment
• Sweet Devon Black Bra & Panties
• Groom Gets Revenge
• Sweet Devon Jersey Pics
• Quick and Dirty Jokes
• Wife Got Caught Cheating?

Blakk Frogg wants to give honorable mention to Calories Burned During Sex, Carolina Panthers Cheerleader Has a NICE Ass, Tightrope Walker and the 85 Year Old Blowjob, Blonde and the Bodybuilder and 365 Attempts to Have Sex.

Well, that’s all for now. . . but don’t fret because blakk frogg will return again with some new lists of the most popular myspace comments on his myspace resource sites!

The 1st kind of sex is called: Smurf Sex . This kind of sex happens when you first meet someone and you both have sex until you are blue in the face.

The 2nd kind of sex is called: Kitchen Sex . This is when you have been with your partner for a short time and you are so horny you will have sex anywhere, even in the kitchen.

The 3rd kind of sex is called: Bedroom Sex . This is when you have been with your partner for a long time. Your sex has gotten routine and you usually have sex only in your bedroom.

The 4th kind of sex is called: Hallway Sex . This is when you have been with your partner for too long. When you pass each other in the hallway you both say “screw you”.

The 5th kind of sex is called: Courtroom Sex . This is when you cannot stand your partner anymore. Then they take you to Court and screw you in front of everyone.

The 6th kind is called Religious Sex, which means you get Nun in the morning, Nun in the afternoon and Nun at night.

…….

OOPS. Don’t forget the 7th kind of sex – Social Security Sex . You get a little each month…. But not enough to live on.

Two little boys in first grade were chosen to be the leads in their first school play. It was to be a Shakespearean play. The first little boy was to say, “My fair maiden… I have come to snatch a kiss and fill your soul with hope.” The second little boy was to reply by saying, “Hark!, a pistol shot.”

Well, on opening night in the school auditorium, the two little boys were a bit nervous, knowing that all the seats were going to be filled with grown-ups. The teacher told them to take their places on the stage and to remember to speak very loud as soon as the curtain goes up. The curtain rose and looking out upon the audience the two boys were terrified.

They stood there frozen. So the teacher whispered for them to begin. The first boy yelled out these unforgettable words….. “My fair maiden…. I have come to kiss your snatch! And fill your hole with soap.”

The second boy screams out…..”Hark! a shistol pot, a postle shiss, a pot of shit, horse shit, this is bull shit… I never wanted to be in this stupid play anyway…”