Blakk Frogg Joke Blog

Q. How do you circumcise a hillbilly?

A. Kick his sister in the jaw.

Sarcastic MySpace Motivational Poster Comments

A. The grip.

A. 45 pounds.

Sarcastic MySpace Motivational Poster Comments

Q. What do a Christmas tree and a priest have in common?

A. Their balls are just for decoration.

Sarcastic MySpace Motivational Poster Comments

Q.What is the difference between ‘ooooooh’and ‘aaaaaaah’?

A. About three inches.

Sarcastic MySpace Motivational Poster Comments

Q. How do you find a blind man in a nudist colony?

A. It’s not hard.

Q.Why is divorce so expensive?

A. Because it’s worth it!

Sarcastic MySpace Motivational Poster Comments

A. The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.

Sarcastic MySpace Motivational Poster Comments

A. They both like a tight seal.

Q. What’s the definition of macho?

A. Jogging home from your vasectomy.

Sarcastic MySpace Motivational Poster Comments

A. A guy will actually search for a golf ball

Sarcastic MySpace Motivational Poster Comments

A. The y spray paint X’s on the back of the sheep that kick!

Sarcastic MySpace Motivational Poster Comments

Q. What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker?

A. A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.

Sarcastic MySpace Motivational Poster Comments

A. When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car.

Sarcastic MySpace Motivational Poster Comments

A. Having an orgasm and calling out your own name.

Sarcastic MySpace Motivational Poster Comments

Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady And after the wedding, he laid down the following Rules:

“I’ll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want and I don’t expect any hassle from you. I Expect a great dinner to be on table unless I tell you that I won’t be home for dinner. I’ll go hunting, fishing, boozing and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don’t you give me a hard time about It. Those are my rules. Any comments?”

His new bride said, “No, that’s fine with me. Just understand that there will be sex here at seven O’clock every night … Whether you’re here or not.”

Free Adult MySpace Comments

George Bush has a heart attack and dies. He goes to hell where the Devil is waiting for him.

“I don’t know what to do here,” says the Devil. “You’re on my list but I have no room for you, but you definitely have to stay here, so I’ll tell you what I’m going to do. I’ve got 3 people here who weren’t quite as bad as you. I’ll let one of them go, but you have to take their place. I’ll even let YOU decide who leaves.”

George thought that sounded pretty good, so he agreed. The devil opened the first room.

In it was Ted Kennedy and a large pool of water. He kept resurfacing over and over and over, gasping for air. Such was his fate in hell.

“No!” George said. “I don’t think so. I’m not a good swimmer and don’t think I could do that all day long.”

The devil led him to the next room. In it was Tony Blair with a sledgehammer and a room full of rocks. All he did was swing that hammer, time after time after time, and more rocks appeared. “No! I’ve got this problem with my shoulder. I would be in constant agony if all I could do was break rocks all day!” commented George.

The devil opened a third door. In it, George saw Bill Clinton lying naked on the floor with his arms staked over his head and his legs staked in spread eagle pose. Bent over him was Monica Lewinsky, doing what she does best.

George Bush looked at this in disbelief for a while and finally said, “Yeah, I can handle this.”

The devil smiled and said… “Monica, you’re free to go!”

A guy sticks his head in the barber shop and asks, “How long before I can get a haircut?” The barber looks around the shop and says, “About two hours.” The guy leaves.

A few days later, the same guy sticks his head in the door and asks, “How long before I get a haircut?” The barber looks around the shop full of customers and says, “About two hours.” The guy leaves.

A week later, the same guy sticks his head in the shop and asks, “How long before I can get a haircut?” The barber looks around the shop an says, “About an hour and half.” The guy leaves.

The barber looks over at a friend in the shop and says, “Hey Bill, follow that guy and see where he goes.”

In a little while, Bill comes back into the shop laughing hysterically.

The barber asks, “Bill, where did he go when he left here?”

Bill looked up and said, “To your house.”

Amy, a blonde city girl, marries a Colorado rancher.

One morning, on his way out to check on the cows, the rancher says to Amy, “The insemination man is coming over to impregnate one of our cows today. I drove a nail into the 2 by 4 just above the cow’s stall in the barn. You show him where the cow is when he gets here, OK?” So then the rancher leaves for the fields.

After a while, the artificial insemination man arrives and knocks on the front door. Amy takes him down to the barn. They walk along the row of cows and when she sees the nail, she tells him, “This is the one… right here.”

Terribly impressed by what he seemed to think just might be another ditzy blonde, the man asks, “Tell me lady, how did you know this is the cow to be bred?”

“That’s simple. By the nail over its stall,” Amy explains very confidently.

Then the man asks, “What’s the nail for?”

She turns and walks away, and with complete confidence, says, “I guess it’s to hang your pants on.”

A man bumps into a woman in a hotel lobby and as he does, his elbow accidentally goes into her breast. They are both quite startled.

The man turns to her and says, “Ma’am, if your heart is as soft as your breast, I know you’ll forgive me.”

She replies, “If your penis is as hard as your elbow, I’m in room 221.”

Americas Best MySpace Sex Comments