Blakk Frogg Joke Blog

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The other day we found ourselves faced with a wonderful situation: We had beer, bacon AND a couple of ribeye steaks. Therefore we drank the beer and wrapped the bacon around the ribeyes. Seemed like the right thing to do. We suggest you try it sometime. Preferably on the day you ask us to come over for dinner. Ha ha!

Please accept our deepest and most sincere apologies for not having pictures of the cooked bacon-wrapped ribeye steaks. We unfortunately drank all the beers we had at the house, got drunk, cooked the steaks, and ate without remembering to take pictures. Oops.

Do you know what happened this week back in 1850, in California?

California became a state and…

• The State had no electricity.
• The State had no money.
• Almost everyone spoke Spanish.
• There were gun fights in the streets.

So basically, it was just like California today, except the women had real breasts… and men didn’t hold hands.

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Blakk Frogg likes real breasts on his women and he enjoys looking at the real AND fake ones on Girls for MySpace.

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Sometimes men and women don’t quite see eye to eye on things and Blakk Frogg thinks he may have found the problem. Men and women have different definitions for some very basic words. See below for details!

THINGY (thing-ee) n.

• Female…… Any part under a car’s hood.
• Male….. The strap fastener on a woman’s bra.

VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj.

• Female…. Fully opening up one’s self emotionally to another.
• Male…. Playing football without a cup.

COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n.

• Female… The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one’s partner.
• Male… Leaving a note before taking off on a fishing trip with the boys.

COMMITMENT (ko-mit-ment) n.

• Female…. A desire to get married and raise a family.
• Male…… Trying not to hit on other women while out with this one.

ENTERTAINMENT (en-ter-tayn-ment) n.

• Female…. A good movie, concert, play or book.
• Male…… Anything that can be done while drinking beer.

FLATULENCE (flach-u-lens) n.

• Female…. An embarrassing byproduct of indigestion.
• Male…… A source of entertainment, self-expression, male bonding.

REMOTE CONTROL (ri-moht kon-troh l) n.

• Female…. A device for changing from one TV channel to another.
• Male… A device for scanning through all 375 channels every 5 minutes.

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Your sister hangs out at Americas-Best.Com ….. and so should you.

A recent report issued by the folks at Simply Frogg announced to the world that some people just cannot handle the tough and strenuous rigors of high level athletic competition… and that others cannot handle simple garbage collection duties.

Sarcastic MySpace Comments

Yeah, the word, ‘ouch’ comes to mind at times like this.

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Once again the infamous Blakk Frogg dares to push the limits of good taste by publishing a blog entitled “Oral Sex”.

Oh, and if you HAVE to ask what “oral sex” means, either ‘cuz you never learned or have long since forgotten its meaning, you might wanna’ consider visiting your local ‘Red Light District’ for a crash course. And bring cash, ‘cuz Sally Streetwalker doesn’t accept American Express!

Simply Frogg and Americas Best
free jokes, comments and graphics

Simply Frogg and Americas Best
free jokes, comments and graphics

Simply Frogg and Americas Best
free jokes, comments and graphics

In case you want ’em for YOUR MySpace pages, blogs, whatever…. visit Simply Frogg MySpace Comments and pick up the drag-n-drop code today!

I said TODAY, damn it! TODAY!

– blakk frogg

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Little Johnny’s neighbors had a baby. Unfortunately, the baby was born without ears. When the mother and new baby came home from the hospital, Johnny’s family was invited over to see the baby.

Before they left their house, Little Johnny’s dad had a talk with him and explained that the baby had no ears. His dad also told him that if he so much as mentioned anything about the baby’s missing ears or even said the word “ears” he would get the spanking of his life when they came back home.

Little Johnny told his dad he understood completely.

When Johnny looked in the crib he said: “What a beautiful baby.”

The mother said: “Why, thank you, Little Johnny.”

Johnny said: “He has beautiful little feet and beautiful little hands, a cute little nose and really beautiful eyes. Can he see?”

“Yes”, the mother replied, “we are so thankful; the Doctor said he will have 20/20 vision.”

“That’s great,” said Little Johnny, “‘cuz he’d be shit-outta-luck if he needed glasses.”