Blakk Frogg Joke Blog

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The math teacher saw that little Johnny wasn’t paying attention in class.

She called on him and said, “Johnny! What are 2 and 4 and 28 and 44?”

Little Johnny quickly replied, “NBC, FOX, ESPN and the Cartoon Network!”


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13 Aug, 2009

Chicken Wrapped Bacon?

Posted by: Blakk Frogg In: Humor|Sarcastic

The name “Chicken Wrapped Bacon” sounded like something we would create in our own kitchen when we had two things available to us: chicken and bacon. So therefore, we believed we knew what to expect:


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  • a super fat marinated chicken breast stuffed with bacon or;
  • a cornish game hen with a few pounds of bacon rammed up its butt or;
  • a live chicken running around with strips of pork, beef or turkey products clogging its rear blow hole

The first two options we could handle but the third, no way. Thankfully we just threw that third option in for a bit of humor. Kinda’ like the reason why we threw a few silly pictures into this post.


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So anyways, we learned of this new dish from a friend of a friend of a friend who knows a guy that once played poker with the guy who runs the restaurant where they serve this dish. The restaurant, Four Moons in Orangeburg, SC, has a reputation for having some really cool, really tasty and really unique offerings on its menus.

To quote off the Four Moons Dinner Menu, “Chicken Wrapped Bacon” consists of…

Pan Roasted Chicken Breast Wrapped Around Slow Roasted Pork Belly, with Yukon Potato Butter Sauce, Crispy Parsnips, and Spinach with Gruyere.

Wow. Not quite anything from the list of three possibilities we thought of, but damn that sounds good. We can practically taste the juices from the pork belly oozing through the chicken meat as we write this.

Hopefully someone will get us a picture of this dish ‘cuz… well, we want one!

Some places really know how to make fire safety work in their favor. By cleverly placing fire safety signs around the office an employer can kill off a certain percentage of the workforce instead of having to lay them off or fire them outright.

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12 Aug, 2009

Bacon Flavored Asparagus Medley

Posted by: Blakk Frogg In: Humor|Sarcastic

Many of our readers have asked if we exist solely on a diet of meat and/or bacon. Nope. We eat vegetables, too. Think of it this way: Do Buffalo Wings taste the same w/o carrots and celery as side dishes? No.

So without further ado, please welcome a bacon concoction which uses a bag of frozen asparagus vegetable medley, two slices of bacon, half of a fresh jalapeno, and a touch of minced garlic. Double wrap it in aluminum foil and place it on the top rack of your grill or in a place on the grill where it won’t get too much direct flame. Cook until done and serve. Now EAT.

Bacon Seasoned Vegetable Medley

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11 Aug, 2009

Deep… Fried… Bacon… Seriously.

Posted by: Blakk Frogg In: Humor|Sarcastic

We have known about the practice of battering up a slice of bacon and deep frying it for some time now. We have also chosen to ignore it — until now. For some reason we decided to look it up today and see if we could find a good picture of it.

Lucky for you we have become masters in the art of hunting bacon images. Why? Because otherwise you might have gotten stuck w/ a blurred picture taken on a cellphone by a drunken monkey instead of this super cool(?) video from YouTube.

No offense to all the drunken monkeys w/ cellphones out there.

Our Opinion of Deep Fried Bacon:

Although we find all bacon inherently good, none of us here at MoreBaconPlease.Com really understand why perfectly good bacon needs to get tossed in batter and deep fried. We have found that most things battered and fried tend to taste pretty much like the batter and lose the original flavor of whatever got drowned in batter.

Now keep in mind we have not yet had the pleasure(?) of trying this, um, delicacy… so don’t take our words on this popular(?) deep fried meat treat as Bacon Gospel.

11 Aug, 2009

Bacon Wrapped Jumbo Chicken Franks

Posted by: Blakk Frogg In: Humor|Sarcastic

While some people look down on non-beef hot dogs, some people, like us for example, have a budget for groceries and cannot always buy Nathan’s All Beef or Hebrew National franks. Therefore we look to the right or left of those hot dog brands and sometimes discover things a lot of people may overlook… such as Jumbo Chicken Franks.

Wrap those meaty bastards in regular or thick sliced bacon and throw them on the grill for a real treat!

Bacon Wrapped Jumbo Chicken Franks Ready for the Grill

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10 Aug, 2009

Bacon Review: Fresh ‘Market Bacon’

Posted by: Blakk Frogg In: Humor|Sarcastic

At first we had some confusion over the term ‘market bacon’ because we picked this More Bacon Please blog posting’s selection up from a local butcher shop. It seemed more logical to us that market bacon ought to come from a supermarket and after a heated exchange amongst ourselves on the topic, we decided to say, “Ah Hell… Let’s just cook the f’ing bacon and see what happens.

With the nomenclature issue behind us, we carefully unwrapped our parcel of fresh cut market bacon and laid it out on the counter. We had some doubts right off the bat. It looked… very fatty and also it seemed as though they had sliced it extremely thin.

Raw Market Bacon From Local Butcher Shop

We had some difficulty separating the slices due to their thin nature, but we quickly got our slices of market bacon into the pan to see how they would handle the heat. We opted for a smaller pan since all our larger ones had, um, well, not gotten cleaned before we started our experiment with the market bacon.

No one ever SAID we would get a prize from Better Homes and Gardens for housekeeping, but we also don’t live like TOTAL slobs…. usually. But never mind that. Let’s get back to the bacon!

Market Bacon Cooking

Within seconds of heat hitting the market bacon strips we heard popping and sizzling. Though we adore the sound of bacon cooking, that much popping and sizzling from bacon so early in the cooking process would certainly mean our bacon strips would generate a TON of bacon grease.

Yep. After only EIGHT strips of market bacon had gone into the pan we had to perform an Emergency De-Greasing of the pan AND wipe down the stove. Despite using a modest heat level we still had a massive number of bacon grease splatter marks all over the stove, counter and floor next to the stove.

Now let us remind you that the following quanitity of bacon grease came from ONLY eight strips of bacon…

Market Bacon Made a Lot of Bacon Grease

Some people would have given up hope at this point and written the concept of market bacon off completely because of the grease given off. Those people don’t really love bacon and clearly ought to hand over all their supply of bacon to the real bacon lovers in this world — namely us.

Ther strips held their long slender shapes quite well during the cooking process and gave off what we called a ‘traditional’ bacon smell. Their color developed into a nice shade of brown and when placed on a plate and blotted gently with a paper towel they looked pretty darn tasty.

Market Bacon Cooked and Ready to Eat

Time to put appearance, smell and grease production aside… and give market bacon its most important test: We call it the “Stuffing a Piece into One’s Face Test” and we don’t mind signing up as guinea pigs for this one. Consider it our sacrifice for the sake of other bacon lovers worldwide.

  • Crunchy. Varied cooking times did not seem to change this characteristic too much. Not too crunchy, as each piece still seemed to have some meatiness to it that required chewing.
  • Salty. This type of bacon definitely had some serious sodium. It didn’t parch us to the point where we felt the need to shotgun beers immediately after each piece, but we definitely noticed the salt.
  • Not as greasy as we initially expected. With all those gallons (not literally) of bacon grease we siphoned off with a sump pump (somewhat exaggerated) we expected the bacon to have a slimy, soggy, greasy finish — but it didn’t. Totally cool with OUR tastebuds.

Conclusion:

Not at all what we expected to get from a butcher shop and we decided that the term ‘market’ in market bacon’s name referred to its remarkable similarity in appearance, taste, texture, and ability to produce copious amounts of grease in a very short period of time. Definitely a great bacon to choose if entertaining a large group for breakfast or brunch and you want to serve a bacon that pretty much everyone will like because it DOES so closely resemble most common bacons from the supermarket.

We would like to note that we do not recommend market bacon for a BLT or other bacon-oriented dish where meatiness of the bacon would make or break the project.

In the end we give “market bacon” a final rating of 3 strips (out of 5).


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First of all, you will like this site because it has lots of sarcasm, plenty of humor, and a healthy dose of everything your dear mommy warned you not touch when taking a shower at the local athletic club.


  • admin: How can people not like this photo? Seriously. These girls have WONDERFUL personalities that just leap out of their shirts, er, eyes. Yes. Blakk Fr
  • admin: In other news, the children ingested so much of the drug that it took their parents a solid two weeks to catch the little bastards and beat their behi
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