While some people look down on non-beef hot dogs, some people, like us for example, have a budget for groceries and cannot always buy Nathan’s All Beef or Hebrew National franks. Therefore we look to the right or left of those hot dog brands and sometimes discover things a lot of people may overlook… such as Jumbo Chicken Franks.
Wrap those meaty bastards in regular or thick sliced bacon and throw them on the grill for a real treat!
11 Aug, 2009
Posted by: Blakk Frogg In: Americas Best|Funny Pictures|Humor|MySpace|MySpace Comments|MySpace Pictures|Sarcastic
At first we had some confusion over the term ‘market bacon’ because we picked this More Bacon Please blog posting’s selection up from a local butcher shop. It seemed more logical to us that market bacon ought to come from a supermarket and after a heated exchange amongst ourselves on the topic, we decided to say, “Ah Hell… Let’s just cook the f’ing bacon and see what happens.
With the nomenclature issue behind us, we carefully unwrapped our parcel of fresh cut market bacon and laid it out on the counter. We had some doubts right off the bat. It looked… very fatty and also it seemed as though they had sliced it extremely thin.
We had some difficulty separating the slices due to their thin nature, but we quickly got our slices of market bacon into the pan to see how they would handle the heat. We opted for a smaller pan since all our larger ones had, um, well, not gotten cleaned before we started our experiment with the market bacon.
No one ever SAID we would get a prize from Better Homes and Gardens for housekeeping, but we also don’t live like TOTAL slobs…. usually. But never mind that. Let’s get back to the bacon!
Within seconds of heat hitting the market bacon strips we heard popping and sizzling. Though we adore the sound of bacon cooking, that much popping and sizzling from bacon so early in the cooking process would certainly mean our bacon strips would generate a TON of bacon grease.
Yep. After only EIGHT strips of market bacon had gone into the pan we had to perform an Emergency De-Greasing of the pan AND wipe down the stove. Despite using a modest heat level we still had a massive number of bacon grease splatter marks all over the stove, counter and floor next to the stove.
Now let us remind you that the following quanitity of bacon grease came from ONLY eight strips of bacon…
Some people would have given up hope at this point and written the concept of market bacon off completely because of the grease given off. Those people don’t really love bacon and clearly ought to hand over all their supply of bacon to the real bacon lovers in this world — namely us.
Ther strips held their long slender shapes quite well during the cooking process and gave off what we called a ‘traditional’ bacon smell. Their color developed into a nice shade of brown and when placed on a plate and blotted gently with a paper towel they looked pretty darn tasty.
Time to put appearance, smell and grease production aside… and give market bacon its most important test: We call it the “Stuffing a Piece into One’s Face Test” and we don’t mind signing up as guinea pigs for this one. Consider it our sacrifice for the sake of other bacon lovers worldwide.
Conclusion:
Not at all what we expected to get from a butcher shop and we decided that the term ‘market’ in market bacon’s name referred to its remarkable similarity in appearance, taste, texture, and ability to produce copious amounts of grease in a very short period of time. Definitely a great bacon to choose if entertaining a large group for breakfast or brunch and you want to serve a bacon that pretty much everyone will like because it DOES so closely resemble most common bacons from the supermarket.
We would like to note that we do not recommend market bacon for a BLT or other bacon-oriented dish where meatiness of the bacon would make or break the project.
In the end we give “market bacon” a final rating of 3 strips (out of 5).
Yep. Sometimes a man has to go w/o the things he loves most in life. Sometimes, bacon makes that list. EGADS!
But anyways, for all out there who have gone w/o bacon today, this sizzle’s for you!
If the video does not play w/in a few seconds, you can See The Video by Clicking Here
If anyone reading this blog posting finds this sandwich revolting, why the HELL did you come to this site in the first place? Take your sorry butt off our site and stop wasting our bandwidth! We don’t have TIME for people who think like… vegetarians!
Ha ha. Actually, vegetarians have some pretty cool bacon-less recipes. Some of our good friends live vegetarian lifestyles and they come here all the time to see what sort of bacon naughtiness we’ve posted.
So no, we don’t hate vegetarians. We hate people who criticize bacon. Case closed. Now enjoy the giant bacon sandwich… and the bottle of Wild Turkey next to it!
LEGAL DISCLAIMER: We harmed no vegetarians or vegans while writing this blog entry.
10 Aug, 2009
Posted by: Blakk Frogg In: Americas Best|Funny Pictures|Humor|MySpace|MySpace Comments|MySpace Pictures|Sarcastic
Much thanks to US for making this wonderful bacon adventure possible. For those unfamiliar with slab bacon, we didn’t know much about it, either, until now.
At first glance we thought it looked a bit fatty and we noticed that the butcher shop had cut the slab bacon quite a bit thicker than we had seen bacon in the past.
As you can see, the slab bacon definitely seemed to have some serious fat lines running through it. Oh well. The bacon sampling must go on!
So next we got out the trusty frying pan and fired up the stove. Then we added… bacon. Wow. What a surprise, right?
To be honest, though, at this point we expected this slab bacon to produce a HUGE amount of grease. We got a pleasant surprise instead.
The pan barely wound up with any bacon grease at all despite the WONDERFUL, rich aroma of bacon which filled the kitchen and our lungs. Additionally, we saw very little shrinkage in the meat throughout the cooking process.
We wound up with a nice, healthy looking batch of bacon which we could hardly wait to eat…
Taste Test Results: Slab bacon itself contained a lot of grease. It left our lips slimy with bacon grease despite careful blotting off of surface grease wth paper towels. The meat required a good deal of chewing and edges sometimes got damn near impossible to chew through. The flavor of the meat, though, definitely made it a pleasure to eat regardless of its occasional rubberiness. Also, we did not get slapped in the face with an overly salty taste, and we liked that a lot. All bacon should contain some salt, yes, but too much salt destroys one’s enjoyment of the meat.
Varied cooking times and temperatures yielded similar results.
Conclusion: Slab bacon has a very strong character and would look great on a plate when serving up a breakfast, lunch or dinner where appearance meant a lot. We don’t think slab bacon will become a staple here at our place, but from time-to-time we will make a trip to the butcher shop to pick up some more. The flavor of the meat merits another trip!
We give “slab bacon” a final rating of 3 strips (out of 5).
09 Aug, 2009
Posted by: Blakk Frogg In: Americas Best|Funny Pictures|Humor|MySpace|MySpace Comments|MySpace Pictures|Sarcastic
What better way to start your Sunday than with a scene of utter carnage, right? Thankfully no bacon was injured in this incident. Many burgers, however, suffered tragic deaths and had to be ‘disposed of’. Our hearts and prayers go out to all the bacon which lost its partner on a bacon burger…
08 Aug, 2009
Posted by: Blakk Frogg In: Americas Best|Funny Pictures|Humor|MySpace|MySpace Comments|MySpace Pictures|Sarcastic
