A man wakes up in the hospital with bandages covering pretty much all of his body.
The doctor comes in and says, “Ah, I see you’ve regained consciousness. Now you probably won’t remember, but the paramedics pulled you out of a huge pile-up on the Interstate a few weeks ago. Don’t fret, though because you will walk again. More or less you will be fine, with one exception: In the chaos of the collision your ‘manhood’ got severed in the accident and we couldn’t find it.”
As the man lays there groaning over his lost manhood, the doctor goes says, “You’ve got $9,000 in insurance compensation coming and we can rebuild you a new penis… but the operation will cost lot since it’s a relatively new technology. It’ll cost roughly $1,000 an inch.”
Hearing the glimmer of hope, the man perks up.
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“So,” the doctor says, “Now you must decide how many inches you want. I understand that you have been married for over thirty years, so I do believe you ought to talk this over with your wife before making a decision.”
“The doctor goes on to say, “If you had a five-incher before and get a nine-incher now, she might be a bit put out.”
Before the man has a chance to respond, the doctor continues by saying, “On the other hand, if you had a nine-incher before and decide to only invest in a five-incher now, she might be a bit disappointed. It’s important that she plays a role in helping you make a decision.”
The man agrees to talk it over with his wife.
The doctor comes back the next day, “So, have you spoken with your wife?”
“Yes I have,” says the man.
“And… has she helped you make a decision?”
“Yes” says the man.
“OK, that’s great. What’s your decision?” asks the doctor.
“We’re getting granite counter tops.”
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