Blakk Frogg Joke Blog

Archive for the ‘Alcohol’ Category

Two men are out ice fishing at their favorite fishing hole, just fishing quietly and drinking their ice cold beers.

Almost silently, so as not to scare the fish, Bob says, “I think I’m going to divorce my wife – she hasn’t spoken to me in over 2 months.”

Earl continues slowly sipping his beer, then thoughtfully says, “You better think it over. Women like that are hard to find.”

The other night I was invited out for a night with “the girls.” I told my husband that I would be home by midnight, “I promise!”

Well, the hours passed and the margaritas went down way too easy. Around 3 a.m., a bit loaded, I headed for home.

Just as I got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hall started up and cuckooed 3 times. Quickly, realizing my husband would probably wake up, I cuckooed another 9 times. I was really proud of myself for coming up with such a quick-witted solution, in order to escape a possible conflict with him. (Even when totally smashed…3 cuckoos plus 9 cuckoos totals 12 cuckoos =MIDNIGHT!)

The next morning my husband asked me what time I got in, and I told him “Midnight”. He didn’t seem mad at all. Whew! Got away with that one!

Then he said, “We need a new cuckoo clock.”

When I asked him, “Why?” he said, “Well, last night our clock cuckooed three times, then said, “Oh Shit”, cuckooed 4 more times, cleared it’s throat, cuckooed another 3 times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, and then tripped over the coffee table and farted.”


Americas Best MySpace Drinking Comments

For years Blakk Frogg avoided tequila. He simply could not stand the smell or taste of the stuff. It made him gag each time people around him drank it even if he wasn’t joining them.

Then, one day, he met a bartender who SWORE she knew a way to get him to drink tequila…..


Sarcastic MySpace Comments

Needless to say, Blakk Frogg learned to love tequila…. until the ugly, hairy, fat bartender showed up. Yuck. Straight back to bottled beer he went!

A man and his wife are awakened at 3 o’clock in the morning by a loud pounding on the door.

The man gets up and goes to the door, where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push.

“Not a chance,” says the husband, “it is 3 o’clock in the morning!

He slams the door and returns to bed.

“Who was that?” asked his wife.

“Just some drunk guy asking for a push,” he answers.

“Did you help him?” she asks.

“No, I did not, it’s 3 o’clock in the morning and it is pouring out there!”

“Well, you have a short memory,” says his wife. “Can’t you remember about three months ago when we broke down, and those two guys helped us? I think you should help him, and you should be ashamed of yourself!”

The man does as he is told, gets dressed, and goes out into the pounding rain.

He calls out into the dark, “Hello, are you still there?”

“Yes” comes back the answer.

“Do you still need a push?” calls out the husband.

“Yes, please!” comes the reply from the dark.

“Where are you?” asks the husband.

“Over here on the swing!” replies the drunk.


Americas Best MySpace Drinking Comments

I just read an article on the dangers of drinking wine and beer…

It Scared the shit out of me.

So that’s it!

After today, no more reading.


Americas Best MySpace Drinking Comments

The month of November has come and gone… which means the time has come for Blakk Frogg to proudly display the most popular MySpace Comments for the past month.

americas best myspace comments
Americas Best MySpace Comments

americas best myspace comments
Americas Best MySpace Comments

americas best myspace comments
Americas Best MySpace Comments

americas best myspace comments
Americas Best MySpace Comments

americas best myspace comments
Americas Best MySpace Comments

Click Here for Popular MySpace Comments 6 – 10

Sorry, folks, but this postings contains a random rant by Blakk Frogg, not a joke…..  Deal with it!

Many years ago people tried their hardest to get Blakk Frogg to drink Guinness Beer. They told him how good it tasted, how it went well with this food, that food, by itself, etc. Needless to say Blakk Frogg couldn’t STAND the taste of the stuff.

Now, however, he would KILL for a chance to sit at one of his favorite pubs/taverns back home with giant platter of steamed clams (w/ hot sauce!) in front of him and a cold, freshly poured Guinness beer at the ready. Times change, right?


Sarcastic MySpace Comments

Now granted the above cartoon does illustrate a good point, but hey…. the beer tastes good and the clams w/ hot sauce alongside it taste even better!

Guinness on Tap + Good Clams + Blakk Frogg = Good Times Guaranteed!

Blakk Frogg moved to the South a little more than three years ago and loves the weather down here. Additionally, he has met some rather unique and interesting people who may actually OWN and or DO some of the things you’ll see below:


redneck palm pilot

redneck wedding reception

redneck weather station

redneck cat

redneck lottery winner

redneck lawnmower

redneck horseshoes

redneck harley

redneck gingerbread house

redneck guest bedrooms

redneck grill

redneck bass boat

Find more Redneck Pics for MySpace here.

Blakk Frogg admits that he made a very brief effort research the meaning behind the President of the United States sparing the lives of two turkeys just before Thanksgiving…. and found out only that our country has done this for 60 years now. So that makes for approximately 120 spared birds. Wow.

At any rate, let’s look at some recent additions to the Sarcastic MySpace Comments website:


Sarcastic MySpace Comments


Sarcastic MySpace Comments


Sarcastic MySpace Comments

Wanna’ see the other 1,400+ free Sarcastic MySpace Comments? Click the link, be merry, drink sherry, and stop molesting Larry!

Three men… a doctor, a lawyer, and a biker, sat in a bar talking over a few drinks. After a sip of his martini, the doctor said, “You know, tomorrow is my anniversary. I bought my wife a diamond ring and a new Mercedes. I figure if she doesn’t like the diamond ring, then at least she will like the Mercedes, and she will know that I love her.”

After finishing his scotch, the lawyer said, “Well, on my last anniversary, I bought my wife a string of pearls and a trip to the Bahamas. I figured if she didn’t like the pearls, then at least she would have enjoyed the trip, and she would have known that I loved her.”

The Biker then took a big swig from his beer and said, “Yeah, well for my anniversary, I got my old lady a t-shirt and a vibrator. I figured if she didn’t like the t-shirt, then she could go fuck herself.”


Americas Best MySpace Motorcycles Comments


Share This on

Is Your Water Safe?


Water Testing Blog

Kill the Zombies!




About This Site


First of all, you will like this site because it has lots of sarcasm, plenty of humor, and a healthy dose of everything your dear mommy warned you not touch when taking a shower at the local athletic club.


  • admin: How can people not like this photo? Seriously. These girls have WONDERFUL personalities that just leap out of their shirts, er, eyes. Yes. Blakk Fr
  • admin: In other news, the children ingested so much of the drug that it took their parents a solid two weeks to catch the little bastards and beat their behi
  • Intimate Touch Tuesday | MySpace Comments & Jokes: [...] you survived the horror called Monday and showed back up to face… Tuesday. Good for you! As a reward for your devotion and effort, [...]