As a result of the company’s recent financial troubles, the boss had to get rid of somebody. He narrowed it down to one of two people, Debra or Jack.
It was an impossible decision because they were both super workers so rather than flip a coin, he decided he would fire the first one who used [...]

Last month, National University of Lesotho scientists released the results of a recent analysis that revealed the presence of female hormones in beer. Men should take a concerned look at their beer consumption.
The theory is that beer contains female hormones (hops contain phytoestrogens) and that by drinking enough beer, men can turn into women.
To test [...]

A woman walks up to an elderly looking man sitting in a chair on his porch. “I couldn’t help but notice how happy you look,” she said. “What’s your secret for a long, happy life?”
“I smoke three packs a day, drink a case of beer, eat fatty foods, and never, ever exercise,” he replied.
“Wow, that’s [...]

From the State where drunk driving is considered a sport, comes an alleged true story from Central Montana.
Recently a routine police patrol parked outside a local Neighborhood tavern. Late in the evening the officer noticed a man leaving the bar so intoxicated that he could barely walk. The man stumbled around the parking lot for [...]

A man goes to a party and has too much to drink. His friends plead with him to let them take him home. He says NO — he only lives a mile away.
About five blocks from party, the police pull him over. They check his license and ask him to get out of the car [...]

I am passing this on to you because it definitely works, and we could all use a little more calmness in our lives.
By following simple advice heard on the Dr. Phil show, you too can find inner peace.
Dr Phil proclaimed, “The way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you have started [...]

Dear Wife,
During the past year I have tried to make love to you 365 times. I have succeeded 36 times, which is an average of once every ten days. The following is a list of why I did not succeed more often:
54 times the sheets were clean
17 times it was too late
49 times you were [...]

Whenever a man has something to say, you can be sure a woman always has to have her say in the end…
He said… Want a quickie?
She said… As opposed to what?

Americas Best MySpace Sex Comments
He said… I don’t know why you wear a bra; you’ve got nothing to put in it.She said… You wear briefs, [...]

Notes From An Inexperienced Chili Tester Named FRANK, who was visiting Texas from the East Coast:
“Recently, I was honored to be selected as a judge at a chili cook-off. The original person called in sick at the last moment and I happened to be standing there at the judge’s table asking directions to the beer [...]

Blakk Frogg says, “Steven Wright a very funny guy. Don’t know if he’d make a very funny woman, though.”
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One of my favorite comics, as I stated in an edition of americas-best.com, was, and still is, a strange fellow named Steven Wright.
Ever so simple and direct, his words speak [...]