Goes Home Drunk to His Wife
Posted by: admin In: Adult Humor|Bodily Functions|Funny Jokes|Gross|Humor|Jokes
Two buddies, George and Terry, are getting very drunk at a bar when suddenly Terry throws up all over himself. “Oh, no. Now Carolyn will kill me!”
George says, “Don’t worry, pal. Just tuck a twenty in your breast pocket and tell Carolyn that someone threw up on you and gave you twenty dollars for the dry cleaning bill.”
So they stay for another couple of hours and get even drunker. Eventually, Terry strolls into his home where Carolyn starts to give him a really hard
time.
“You reek of alcohol and you’ve puked all over yourself! My God, you’re disgusting!”
Speaking very carefully and doing his best not to slur, Terry says, “Nowainaminit, I can e’splain everythin! Itsh not wha j! ew think. I only had a cupla drrrinks. But thiss other guy got ssick on me . . . he had one too many and he juss couldin hold hizz liquor. He said he was verrry sorry an’gave me twennie bucks for the cleaning bill!”
Carolyn looks in the breast pocket and says, “But this is forty bucks!”
“Oh, yeah… I almos’ fergot, … he shhhit in my pants, too.”
