Blakk Frogg Joke Blog

No Time to Cook Bacon? No Problem!

Posted by: Blakk Frogg In: Humor|Sarcastic

Sometimes fate has a cruel sense of humor and finds a way to put distance between a person and what matters most in their life: Bacon.

Thanks to all the recent developments in Bacon Technology times like these no longer have to rob a person of the flavor they love. See below for an example of a real-life situation where a scientific bacon breakthrough can save your… bacon:

Example: You wake up later than usual one morning with a throbbing headache most likely caused by the… pollen and pollution in the air. All those imported beers or stiff drinks you had the night before (until 2 AM) had nothing to do with it.

You barely have enough time to shower, get dressed, and get out the door. Fortunately for you, though, you boiled some eggs the night before (while drunk) thinking you would have plenty of time to cook some bacon, sit down with a few eggs, have somewhat of a normal breakfast, and read the newpaper headlines.

Cancel THAT play, ya’ stinkin’ lush. Now you will have to eat the hard boiled eggs on the way to work or get in trouble for getting there late — again. You, my friend, have successfully screwed yourself out of bacon this morning.

Or have you? Maybe not! You’ll STILL have to eat the eggs on your way to work… but if you pour some bacon salt in the baggie with the eggs, and shake appropriately, you’ll get some bacon flavor in every bite!

Thank you, bacon salt, for saving the day! We love you!

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First of all, you will like this site because it has lots of sarcasm, plenty of humor, and a healthy dose of everything your dear mommy warned you not touch when taking a shower at the local athletic club.

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