Blakk Frogg Joke Blog

You Know You’re in Bad Shape at Work When…

Posted by: admin In: Alcohol|Blakk Frogg Speaks|Drinking|Funny Jokes|Jokes|Sarcastic

Most of us have had the unfortunate pleasure of going into work with a hangover. Life gets pretty amusing for the span of time that you spend at work after downing a few too many brewskis, taking too many shots, and mixing too many different liquors the night before; especially if you get MAYBE, at BEST, two or three hours of sleep.

So, without further ado, “You know you’re in bad shape at work when…

  1. The phone looks “too heavy to lift” when it rings.
  2. You groan every time you go to reach for the mouse.
  3. The thought of going to lunch sounds too much like work.
  4. Fax machines remind you of horror film sound effects.
  5. The clock snickers at you.
  6. Co-workers refuse to enter the bathroom after you for fear of what you may leave in there.
  7. Mt. Dew tastes like an elixir of the gods.
  8. You empty the water cooler by yourself…. And still can’t pee.
  9. Every time you exhale, a key on your keyboard melts.
  10. The mouthpiece on your phone gets disinfected by the vapors in your breath.
  11. Fluorescent lighting above you starts to sizzle your skin.
  12. The computer monitor in front of you looks and acts like a spotlight.
  13. You begin to sweat acetone from your eyelids.
  14. The idea of pooping your pants at your desk does not sound all that bad anymore.
  15. It feels like someone lit your eyeballs on fire with a road flare.
  16. Although the thought of alcohol offends you, Happy Hour still sounds like fun after work.
  17. You cannot, for the life of you, figure out what is so Happy about Happy Hour anymore.
  18. The hamster in your thought wheel is playing with a jackhammer.
  19. Elevator music offends you… a lot more than usual.

Thank you for reading an honest to goodness Blakk Frogg original.  Now somebody PLEASE get Blakk Frogg a beer!

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First of all, you will like this site because it has lots of sarcasm, plenty of humor, and a healthy dose of everything your dear mommy warned you not touch when taking a shower at the local athletic club.

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