Blakk Frogg Joke Blog

Ethel was a bit of a demon in her wheelchair, and loved to charge around the nursing home, taking corners on one wheel and getting up to maximum speed on the long corridors. Because the poor woman was one sandwich short of a picnic, the other residents tolerated her and some of them actually joined in the fun

One day Ethel was speeding up one corridor when a door opened and Kooky Clarence stepped out with his arm outstretched. “STOP!,” he shouted in a firm voice. “Have you got a license for that thing?” Ethel fished around in her handbag and pulled out a Kit Kat wrapper and held it up to him. “OK” he said, and away Ethel sped down the hall.

As she took the corner near the TV lounge on one wheel, weird Harold popped out in front of her and shouted “STOP! Have you got proof of insurance?” Ethel dug into her handbag, pulled out a drink coaster and held it up to him. Harold nodded and said “On your way, Ma’am.”

As Ethel neared the final corridor, Crazy Craig stepped out in front other, Butt-Naked, and holding his “You-Know-What” in his hand.

“Oh, good grief,” yelled Ethel, “Not that Damn Breathalyzer Test again!!!”

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Once upon a time, a girl asked a guy….. “Will you marry me?”

The guy said “NO!” and the girl lived happily ever after and went shopping, dancing, drank martinis, always had a clean house, never had to cook, stayed skinny and farted whenever she wanted.

The End.

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Q. What is the similarity between a shrimp and a man?
A. You can enjoy all but the head.

Q. What is the similarity between a dolphin and a man?
A. They are both said to be intelligent, but no one can prove this.

Q. What is the similarity between a microwave oven and a man?
A. They both get hot in 15 seconds.

Q. Why can’t a man be both good looking and intelligent?
A. Since that would make him a woman.

Q. Why is a man’s brain the size of a peanut?
A. Because it is swollen.

Q. Why are batteries better than men?
A. Batteries have at least one positive end.

Q. Why does it take one million sperm to fertilize one egg?
A. Because sperm are male and they refuse to ask directions.

Q. Why are men like the letter Q?
A. Because it is a big fat zero with a small protrusion.

Q. Why do fewer women get married these days?
A. Because they would rather have bacon in the fridge, than a pig in the living room.

Q. What is the similarity between a video recorder and a man?
A. They go forwards, backwards, forwards, and backwards, stop and eject!

Q. Why is the male intelligence worth more than the female?
A. It is rarer.

Q. Why do men prefer to marry virgins?
A. They cannot handle the criticism.

Q. What do you call an attractive, intelligent and sensitive man.
A. A rumor.

Q. Why don’t men go through menopause?
A. They never left puberty.

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