Every once in a great while we get the urge to combine bacon with… pretty much anything we can get our hands on. This time we drank a few too many screwdrivers (that’s vodka and OJ… in case you didn’t know) BEFORE breakfast and thought, “Hey! Wrap the hashbrown thingies in bacon… and bake!”
“Yes, Sir, Captain Belvedere! That sounds like a GREAT idea!”
* burp *
Bacon Wrapped Hashbrowns
The house started to smell pretty good as the slippery meat slowly drained its meaty juices into the hashbrowns and the hasbrowns drank up every drop.
Wow. That sounded pretty obscene.
But anyways, the cooking took place and soon we ventured back to the oven which we keep over near the fridge — the fridge that conveniently held the vodka and OJ. After doling out another round of 22 ounce pre-breakfast brain bashers and giving them a hearty taste test, we opened up the oven and saw…
Bacon Wrapped Hashbrowns
Needless to say we did not get the results we thought we would, but everything turned out OK in the end… ‘cuz it tasted fine and we had no choice BUT to eat the stuff since we had nothing else in the house worth eating and none of us could pass a sobriety test if we got pulled over.
All this before 9 AM. Saturdays ROCK!
We write this blog entry for the REAL motherfroggers out there in Bacon Land… for the HARDWORKING bastards (like us) who just can’t seem to catch a break these days.
The other week we ran into some serious financial woes and found ourselves scrounging for change in the sofa cushions and having to actually plan our meals instead of just opening the fridge/freezer, picking a bacon, selecting a ’side item’, cooking and eating.
Below you will see chicken breasts that we cut into smaller, no longer man-sized portions, and wrapped w/ a few slices of black pepper bacon we had left over from a previous bacon feast.
Pepper Bacon Wrapped Chicken Chunks
Though we did feel incredibly grateful that we at least had food to eat, making what you see in the photo last for 2 dinners and 2 lunches really sucked. Thankfully we had lots of crack cocaine to smoke between meals so we never felt any hunger pains. LOL.
The other day a friend sent us a picture that made our mouths water more than normal. And yes, you dumbass, the picture had bacon in it.
Bacon Wrapped Scallops at Buck Ridge Plantation
Now just imagine getting a picture of a TROUGH filled w/ bacon-wrapped scallops — after you’d just finished eating a lame ass, generic brand hot dog. Granted the hot dog had a jacket of bacon, but still… Scallops trump hot dog ANY damn day!
WTF is Buck Ridge Plantation?
So glad you asked! Our friends tell us people travel from all over the SC area to go there, stay for a few days, and do some serious deer hunting… or they go there for a wedding. LOL.
Seriously, though. The place has a ton of natural, South Carolina wilderness surrounding well-maintained, modern banquet halls and stuff. Clearly an ideal place to have a beautiful wedding — or blast a hole in some of Mother Nature’s best woodland creatures — and kick back with a bucket of bacon-wrapped scallops and cold beer!
