While the bacon does rule our Universe, and all neighboring Universes as well, sometimes people go a little too far with their bacon worship practices… and use bacon in inappropriate ways.
No, we don’t mean some sicko has locked himself in a room with a stack of Playboy or Hustler magazines and 5 pounds of raw bacon. We DO mean that some people add bacon to foods that, in our opinion, ought to have remained bacon-less.
As an example, some creative bastards apparently got stoned one day and blended up a batch of bacon flavored ice cream.
We say, “Hooray” for the presence of bacon, of course… but we really don’t feel all that good about the idea of mixing bacon with our ice cream.
Actually, we feel a bit nauseous right now.
DEA officer stops at a ranch in Texas and talks with an old rancher. He tells the rancher, “I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs..”
The rancher says, “Okay, but do not go in that field over there,” as he points out the location.
The DEA officer verbally explodes saying, ” Mister, I have the authority of the Federal Government with me.” Reaching into his rear pants pocket, he removes his badge and proudly displays it to the rancher. “See this badge? This badge means I am allowed to go wherever I wish….. On any land. No questions asked or answers given. Have I made myself clear? Do you understand? ”
The rancher nods politely, apologizes, and goes about his chores.
A short time later, the old rancher hears loud screams and sees the DEA officer running for his life chased by the rancher’s big Santa Gertrudis bull.
With every step the bull is gaining ground on the officer, and it seems likely that he’ll get gored before he reaches safety. The officer is clearly terrified. The rancher throws down his tools, runs to the fence and yells at the top of his lungs…..
“Your badge! Show him your BADGE!”
Americas Best MySpace Animal Comments
04 Dec, 2009
Posted by: admin In: Humor
Like a lot of folks in this country, Blakk Frogg has a job: He gets up each morning, goes to work, puts in at LEAST solid 8 hours of work. Every other week he gets a check. Simple as that.
He then pays taxes on his earnings and the government distributes his tax dollars as it sees fit.
Here’s the kicker, though… In order to get that paycheck, he has to pass a random urine test, with which he has no problem.
He DOES, however, object to the distribution of his hard-earned tax dollars to people who DON’T have to pass a urine test. He wonders WHY a person doesn’t have to pass a urine test in order to receive HIS money in the form of a welfare check. Seriously… HE has to pass one in order to EARN that money so shouldn’t THEY have to pass one before receiving it?
Please understand that Blakk Frogg has no problem with helping people get back on their feet. He does, on the other hand, have a problem with helping someone sit around on their lazy ass using drugs… on his dime.
Think about how much money state, local and federal government agencies would save if aid recipients had to pass regular, or random, urine tests before they could receive a public assistance check.
Democrat, Republican, Conservative or Liberal, it does not matter. If you agree with this message, spread the word. Otherwise your silence equals acceptance of the current situation… and you have no right to complain.
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You will find Blakk Frogg at Happy Hour…. He’s the tall, drunk bastard dancing on the pool table — again.
